No admit

Working nights, I'm given patients as they're admitted from the ER.  So it's in my best interest for patients to not be admitted.  Patient gets sent home and I get to get some sleep, at least until the pager starts beeping again. The ER resident gets me on the phone:

"I've got one for you."

"You sure?"

"What do you mean?"

"You sure you need to admit him?"

"Yeah, we want to do IV antibiotics."

"Can't do oral, treat as an outpatient?"

"You don't even know what he has."

"I'm just making sure you really want to admit him."

"Yeah, we're going to admit."

"You know, there's a lot of sick people up here.  He could catch something else, might get worse.  You sure you want to take that risk?  Wouldn't it be easier to send him home, maybe have him come back in the morning if he hasn't gotten any better.  Not too early in the morning.  After 7.  Definitely after 7."

"No, we're going to admit him."

"And if I told you we were full?"

"You're not full."

"But, hypothetically, what if we were?"

"Then we'd probably park him here overnight and move him in the morning."

"Ooh, I like that plan."

"But you're not full."

"We might be full."

"You're not full.  Just come down here and take the patient."

"...Fine..."