* * Anonymous Doc

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

"I see on your form that you've had a lot of health problems recently."


"No, on the form, I see you checked that you've been having headaches, stiff neck, coughing, stomach pain, diarrhea, fever--"

"No, I am fine."

"Did you check all these boxes on the form?"

"Let me see that."

I show him the form.

"I do not know why I checked all those boxes."

"But you did check all the boxes-- I'm wondering, if you have trouble reading, we have some programs we can refer you to, it's really okay if that's a problem, I just want to make sure we have an accurate medical history."

"I can read just fine."

"Then I'm just trying to figure out why you checked all of these boxes."

"Sometimes things are blurry. I use eye drops. Visine."

"You have blurry vision?"

"Yes. When I have things close to me, like reading, the letters are blurry. I use eye drops. Is there a more powerful eye drop I can get a prescription for?"

"Have you been to an eye doctor?"

"No. I use eye drops."

"Is it possible you need glasses? It sounds like you might just be farsighted, and need glasses. Would be an easy fix to this problem."

"No, I don't want glasses. Not interested. I'll just use eye drops."

"Yeah, eye drops don't fix this problem. I think you need glasses."

"Never. I'm not interested in glasses."

"Do you drive a car?"


"I am going to have to refer you to an eye doctor."

"I have no interest in an eye doctor."

"I think it's important. And it's really not a big deal-- tons of people wear glasses, and they would help your life tremendously."

"Just give me a prescription for eye drops."

"I don't believe eye drops will help this problem."

"This is why I don't like doctors."


  1. Wow. And you haven't quit yet?

  2. Buhwha?

    It's really too bad you can't hold a patient for being stupid.

  3. You mean the placebo effect isn't able to focus light waves on the retina? Darn.

    I suppose you could have sent him to an eye doctor "to get some prescription eye drops"...

  4. Yeah, but eye doctor's don't really always have the fix either. Let's say you broke your arm. They as the doctor, I tell you I am going to put it in a cast. You ask if this will heal your arm. I tell you no, not really, in a year or two we will check and see how things are; Likely you will just need a bigger cast. See, this is a 'corrective' cast. It doesn't FIX anything. I just charge you $300 bucks and you get to see better for a year or two, and then I get to charge you another $300 for a stronger 'correction'. Unless you are talking lasic, then you aren't actually fixing anything...

    Maybe THAT'S why he doesn't like doctors. (it's similar to the doctor who wants to put you on pills for life...or worse, pills for high blood sugar...instead of fixing what is wrong[don't eat the sugar])

    Just a shot...

  5. My terrible vision will never improve (I've been legally blind since age 14) but I am grateful for my eye doctor. No, I will never be "fixed," not even with Lasik, but if I hadn't had an eye doctor I wouldn't be able to drive, read, watch TV more than a foot away, or (definitely) teach for a living.

    I'm not sure if that's where you were going with this, Anonymous, but it's amazing the amount of medical knowledge eye doctors have to be able to correct vision, if only temporarily. (If I had been born in caveman times, the "herd" would have left me behind to die. Glad I live in the 21st century.)