Anonymous Doctor

We have two patients in the same room with similar names.

To avoid confusion, the attending decided to move one of them to a different room.

I go in to tell the family.

"Oh, no," the patient's sister says. "I'm not having her move into THAT room. I was talking to the family of the patient in that room, and she has something terrible. I don't want my sister to catch that. She's staying right here."

"What the other patient has isn't contagious. I assure you, it's no less safe than this room. We clean the rooms, we take every precaution we can. She's at more risk staying here and being confused for her roommate."

"Well, she's not moving. I know how germs work. They get in the air."

"That's not how germs work. She's not going to catch anything from the other patient. Her condition is not contagious."

"I don't care what you say, she's not moving. Not to that room. That's a sick room."

"You're in a hospital. These are all sick rooms."

"Not like that one."

"Ma'am, I assure you. There have been patients in THIS room with things a lot worse. Every room in here has had people with very serious illnesses, often contagious. You're in a hospital. We clean the rooms between patients. We take precautions. One room is not sicker than another room, I promise."

"Well, she's not moving."

It's one thing to have legitimate concerns with patient care-- I'm not going to pretend we're perfect, I'm not going to pretend everything always goes smoothly. But how about separating real problems from fake problems, so at least we can fight real battles and not crazy ones. Good grief.