* * Anonymous Doc

Friday, June 24, 2011

"No, I don't think I'm being unduly influenced by free trips from pharmaceutical companies," said my attending. "And let me show you some pictures of my children, Angeliq, Portia, and Allegra."

"And of course my dogs, Yasmin and Lyrica."

I want to get a fish and name him Zithromax. Maybe a goldfish. One of those little guys, who lasts about five days before he dies and has to be flushed down the toilet.

I guess I understand why someone might name a pet after a drug-- some of the names are quite mellifluous (Boniva, Cymbalta, Dovonex)-- but a child? I feel like it's a mark of a seriously limited life that someone must lead to think that Flonase sounds like the perfect name to saddle a child with.

I wonder if they hire doctors to name these things. It seems like a far more civilized job than what we actually do. I want to sit in a room all day and come up with names like Requip and Symbicort.

If anyone names her baby Uniretic or Valtrex, I'm reporting them to the psych department.

5 comments:

  1. I love this! Great post!

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  2. C'mon doc… Allegra (given name) - Wikipedia

    Allegra is a female given name of Italian origin meaning joy (happy) or lively.

    The dog thing is kind of funny, but Allegra is a drug named after a common Italian name, not a name that came from a drug.

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  3. *chuckle*

    Can't wait for the mombies to get hold of THAT idea...

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  4. For REALLY bad: my mother was a nurse in the early 1930's, and a black mother asked for a name for her little boy, and the nurses suggested Meconium. And I think the mother used it. Poor child!

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