"So, they tell me you're giving them a problem about going to rehab."
"No, no problem, they're telling me I don't qualify for acute rehab and they want to send me to some kind of nursing home."
"They want to send you to a subacute facility, yeah."
"I don't want to go to a nursing home."
"You won't be in the nursing home part."
"It's still a nursing home."
"It is."
"You told me I could do rehab in the hospital."
"I told you that if you qualified for acute rehab, you could do it here. But you didn't qualify."
"Why not? My insurance is good."
"Your insurance is fine. It's because you're not able to do enough hours a day of rehab. They wrote in the note that you've refused rehab for the past three days."
"I was tired."
"Right, but in order to get into acute rehab, you need to demonstrate an ability to do a certain amount of exercise. And you haven't been. It's an evaluation they have to do. It's disappointing, I'm sure, but as long as you're trying your best, this is going to be a better fit."
"I can do exercise. Just not when I'm tired."
"But if you're tired here, you're going to be tired there."
"No. My wife said she would do the exercise if I couldn't, and then she would show me how to do it when I'm not tired."
"It is not beneficial for your wife to do the exercise."
"It sure is. My wife is fat."
"Okay, but these exercises specifically are designed to strengthen you, not her. You're the patient."
"She needs as much exercise as she can get."
"Everyone should exercise. But we're talking about your rehab, not her exercise."
"If you make her do exercise, I'll do rehab."
"I don't know how these things are related. You need to do rehab."
"If my wife gets to sit on her butt all day, I'm gonna do the same."
"You need to do rehab."
"And all she does is eat."
"We're talking about you, not your wife."
"Can she go to rehab with me?"
"Not unless she has a medical need."
"The system sucks."
"I'm sorry."
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The new reality show competition - Couples Rehab
ReplyDeleteDare I say it? "They're trying to make go to rehab but said NO NO NO!"
ReplyDeleteAs I write this, I am recovering from a total knee replacement. On post op day 2, (that's right, TWO), they told me that I was doing so well that I could leave the next day and gave me the following options: A step-down unit within the hospital (found out later that they had no beds; a rehab facility (so I thought); or home. I was already doing very, very well with PT, but I thought I would be more disciplined about doing my exercises in a rehab than at home. Yup, it was a nursing home and the floor set aside for subacute rehab was really just an extension of the nursing home. I tried to sign myself out that night, but was talked in to staying. I think the nurses and therapists enjoyed having a comparatively young, decidedly healthy, completely oriented patient and they were very nice to me. I really should have gone home that night, but the drugs were better there! I stayed the weekend and got the heck out on Monday. I will admit, I learned a few tricks to getting dressed, but it was not worth the co-pay. TCG
ReplyDeletehahahahah hilarious convo
ReplyDelete