"I brought you a urine sample."
"What? In the bag?"
"It's in a glass. The glass is in the bag."
"We give you sterile collection cups when we need to take a urine sample. Which, incidentally, I have no idea yet-- you may or may not need a urine sample, depending on what's going on with you."
"Well, I brought it just in case."
"We need the collection cups to be sterile. You can't just use a cup from home."
"No, it's not from home. It's from a restaurant."
"Uh... still... it needs to be sterile."
"It's sterile. They said it came from the dishwasher."
"That doesn't mean it's sterile. Wait... you went into a restaurant and asked for a clean glass for a urine sample?"
"No, of course not. They wouldn't have just given me a glass. I took it."
"I would say you should stop by on the way home and give it back, but I'm not sure they'd want it now."
"No-- and they're not open today anyway."
"Wait, what? When is this urine sample from?"
"I don't know, two, three weeks ago. I brought it to my last appointment but the other doctor didn't want it."
"You know they're not good forever. Bacteria gets in. Bacteria that was already in there grows. This is not a good urine sample, for so many, so many, so many reasons."
"So you're saying I should bring it home again?"
"No. I'm saying you should dump it!"
"But it's a nice glass!"