I'm seeing a patient in clinic for the first time.
"So... are you taking any new medications?"
"Sure, I just started on one the other day."
"Really? What medication?"
"And that was prescribed by...?"
"You. The clinic. I got a call the other day with my endoscopy results, and they said they were calling in the prescription, I should get it from the pharmacy, and it was very important I start taking it."
[I grab the chart.]
"Your endoscopy results?"
"You had an endoscopy here?"
"The only endoscopy I see in your file is eight months ago."
"Wait, let me make sure I'm following. You had an endoscopy eight months ago. They called you with the results a couple of days ago, and prescribed you this antifungal medication."
"Yes, that's right."
"And no one called about these results, I don't know, say, eight months ago?"
"The problem that caused you to have the endoscopy-- is it still bothering you?"
"Did you tell them that on the phone, by any chance?"
"Yep. They said I should take the pills anyway."
"Did you happen to get the name of the person who called?"
"Bear with me-- I apologize for all of the questions. I'm just trying to figure out whether for some reason they called you eight months late with your test results, or they called you with someone else's test results... but in either case, I think you can skip the medication."
"Yeah. If you had a problem eight months ago, and it hasn't gotten worse, and the symptoms have gone away, I think we can safely say your body took care of it."
"Should I get another endoscopy?"
"If you don't have any symptoms..."
"I mean if they come back."
"Well, then... I'm tempted to say yes... but probably not here."
"Yeah-- and next time someone calls you with test results from a test that happened, say, more than a season ago-- you can probably feel free to disregard. Do yourself a favor, though-- call for the results next time-- don't wait to be called."
"Oh, I did-- I called seven times, and each time they said they didn't have them yet. So I gave up. I just figured this was how long it took."
"Know for next time-- it is not."