Hot Water For Your Fall?

I return from two weeks of vacation (sorry!) to get a call from a patient:

"I fell."

"Oh no!  What happened?"

"I tripped over a box of potato chips."

"A box?"

"You know, from Costco, a big bulk box of chips."

"You shouldn't be eating chips, you know-- the salt is no good for your heart failure."

"No, these come in bulk, they're cheap."

"Cost isn't the problem."

"It certainly is-- food is expensive!  Not at Costco, though."

"I was just saying you shouldn't eat chips."

"Well, I can't let them go to waste!  I have so many!"

"Whatever-- you said you fell?"

"Yes! In my kitchen! I fell over the box and hit my hands!"

"Are they okay?"

"They hurt. I wanted to know if I should put them in hot water."

"You should put ice on them."

"Not hot water?"

"No, why would you put them in hot water?"

"I thought hot water, with some yeast and sugar.  That's what my mother always did."

"No, I think that's how you bake bread, not how to keep down swelling."

"Oh. You sure?  Ice?"

"Yes. Ice. Come in for an xray if you think anything may be broken--"

"The chips!  They're like crumbs. I fell right on top of the box and crushed it."

"I meant your hand. The bones."

"No, I don't think I have bones there."

"Okay, I'll see you at your next appointment."